During my final years in
high school, ACTS and all things that had to do with my faith were strong and
healthy and I felt like I was on top of the world and I was ready for anything
that came my way when I went to college.
Unfortunately, this
sense of cockiness quickly made me fall face first into the real world, and
everything in the real world isn’t so welcoming and easy, especially to a
college freshman.
I thought I did
everything right. I was attending a Christian university that required us to
take religion classes our first year, and I found a church to attend every
Sunday. The first few weeks I was proud of myself for going to mass and saying
my daily prayers and living a good Christian life. However, that enthusiasm
quickly faded.
As the semester went
on, my motivation to be active in my faith beca
me less and less. I stopped
going to church on Sundays, I stopped reading my bible for class, and I pretty
much stopped praying altogether. I didn’t do it intentionally; I wasn’t trying
to put my faith on standby, but I kept giving myself excuses not to go to mass
and not pray when I was supposed to. My laziness and forgetfulness got the best
of me, and just as quick as the Holy Spirit lit the fire in my heart, I felt it
leave me and I wasn’t interested in growing in my faith any longer. I didn’t
know anyone at my new church, and that happened because I refused to try to get
out of my comfort zone and make new friends. So, because there was no one I
knew at church, I didn’t bother going because I thought, “No one will notice I’m
not there.”
I would go to bed so
late that I would forget to pray, and I would brush it off like no big deal.
Being a part of the Knights of Columbus with my church was the only thing that kept
me coming back to the church for biweekly meetings. Also, I was in a bible
study and I attended it every week, which I would say it was my “church” for
the week since I didn’t go.
It wasn’t until the end
of my freshman year that something changed this. My bible study leader, Brock,
invited me to meet up with him for some grub at Raising Cane’s a few weeks
before I was coming home for the Christmas holidays. We got dinner and he sat
me down and asked me if I wanted to go on a conference put on by the
organization he works for. He described some of the activities we would be
doing and it sounded pretty fun. He even told me that out of everyone in his
multiple bible studies, I was one of the few he saw potential in, and he could
see me doing great things. I was baffled. With the way I was neglecting my
faith, he still saw some of the fire left in my heart and knew that I wanted to
reestablish my relationship with God.
A few weeks later, I
surrendered myself to God once again and my faith was finally my top priority
in my life again. I felt His love and His mercy at the conference, and I
learned so much about leading bible studies and growing in a personal
relationship with God throughout the weekend. I also met so many people that
went to my church because we all traveled and accompanied each other
everywhere. If it weren’t for this conference, I wouldn't have the strong
friendships I have with my church friends right now.
On fire for the Lord, I
quickly got involved with the mass and signed up to serve. I also got more
active in the Knights of Columbus as well as had one-on-one discipleship
meetings with Brock, and I was happier than ever. I was then lucky enough to
attend Bear Awakening 12, a weekend retreat put on by my church. It was just
what I needed as the semester turned down. It gave me the joy I had on my ACTS
retreats, and it strengthened my love for God even more.
This past year has
taught me so many things. You have to try to pursue your faith all the time
because no one else can do it except for you. I’ve never felt more accomplished
in rebuilding my faith until now, and I now have my eyes opened to continue
chasing after God because I’ll never know all the answers, but there’s so much
to learn. I am excited to return back to campus and continue my faith journey
over there, but in the meantime, it’s time to test myself once again this
summer and grow while I’m back home. May the Lord always be my side because I
know I will steer off the road, but it will be Him and in Him alone that I will
come back.
In Christ,
Cody
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